before sunrise/sunset

So i have just finished watching the movie Before Sunrise. It was a brilliant movie about a couple (Ethan Hawke plays Jesse and Julie Delpy plays Celine) of youths who meet on a train in Europe, feel close immediately, and decide to spend just one night together in Vienna (to see what happens). The movie takes you into the lives of these two interesting, exuberant people; their dialogue is real and convincing. The topics they discuss range from trivial to personnal to existential and outreaching. A highly relatable film that you should be sure to take something away from. Their romance is a highly realistic persuasion. I give it a 9/10.

Now i am about to watch its sequel, Before Sunset. The plot seems to be that years later this same couple (who parted ways in the first movie unsure as to whether or not they would ever see each other again at all) are reunited, their feelings revisited.

I have never done this before, but I loved the dialogue in the first movie so much that I want to watch this next movie with my computer in front of me so that I can comment on the things I love or hate, jot down quotes that excite me, and generally just write as I watch. It seems like a worthwhile venture, but we'll see whether or not I am just wasting my time in a moment, I suppose...

Before Sunset:

"What he wants is to fight for meaning."

He was there, waiting for her, and she never showed. Her grandmother had died. She was buried that same day.

her hand is up, palm towards her face, fingers flickers. he is startled.
"say stop," she says. "stop," he says.
her fingers stop flickering, and now she is giving him the bird.

9 years have passed.

"The true work of improving things is in the little achievements of the day."

"I feel like I am designed to be dissatisfied, always searching for improvement."

"Liberate yourself from desire and you will find you have everything you need."

putting passion into action...

"Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the past."
"Can I put that on a bumper sticker?"

"The memory is never finished as long as you're alive."

"If you don't believe in any kind of magic or mystery you are basically as good as dead." -Einstein

they both have partners, both have kids. the tension is palpable, highly sexualized, and sad.

"I am obsessed with the little things about things, people. I see the little details so specific to each of them that I will always miss. You can never replace anyone because everyone has such specific details."

on marriage:
"It's like I have this idea of my best self and I wanted to pursue that even if it might have been overriding my honest self. You know what I means? It's funny. In the moment I remember thinking that it didn't matter, the who of it all, that nobody is going to be everything to you and that ultimately it's just this simple action of committing yourself, of meeting your responsibilities that matters. What is love if not respect, trust, admiration? And I felt all those things. So cut to the present tense and I feel like I'm running a small nursery with someone I used to date."

"Being alone is better than sitting next to a lover and being lonely."

"I don't want to be one of those people, getting divorced at 52, falling into tears and admitting that they never really loved their spouse and that their life has been sucked up into a vacuum cleaner."

she goes to touch him, she hesitates. she doesn't touch him. he is not looking at her. he did not notice her hand.

"I want to see if you stay together or if you dissolve into molecules."

let me sing you a waltz
out of nowhere
out of my thoughts

let me sing you a waltz
about this one-night stand

you were, for me, that night
everything i always dreamt of in life
but now you're gone
you are far-gone
all the way to your island of rain

it was, for you, just a one night thing
but you were much more to me
just so you know
i don't care what they say
i know what you meant for me that day

i just want another try
i just want another night
even if it doesn't seem quite right

you meant, for me, much more
than anyone i've met before
one single night with you, little jesse
is worth a thousand with anybody

i have no bitterness, my sweet
i'll never forget this one night thing
even tomorrow, in other arms
my heart will stay yours until i die

let me sing you a waltz
out of nowhere
out of my blues

let me sing you a waltz
about this lovely one night stand

the sounds of Nina Simone kick in.

"Baby, you are gonna miss that plane."

:Fin



The movie was brilliant. You are allowed to see and hear literally every moment of their reunion, all 80 minutes of it. It was so real, like being a voyeur on two peoples' lives, yet you never feel like you are intruding. They are charming and honest, and you love them. Before Sunset is even more beautiful than Before Sunrise because you see their love as well as their disillussionment, can taste their jaded thoughts, can feel their hearts swelling. And the ending is perfect. Absolutely a 10/10.

latest theater discovery

i give it a 7.5/10. nice job quentin. congratulations on dialogue well done yet again. and who wouldn't love the ending?

awesome and strange

AWESOME

http://liveartbites.blogspot.com/2007/08/tokyo-artistic-climbing-wall.html

STRANGE

i went deep into my personnal writing vaults, the ones i shut up and have not been in for a little over three years now, and was absolutely startled and sometimes frightened by the short stories i found. they are so full of pain and anger that i had put aside or forgotten. it was cathartic to read these pieces again, but also very scary.

newness

Here's an update on things in my life:

Evan has graduated from Evergreen and is looking for a job and place up here in Bellingham so that he can be with me while I finish up school at Western. We are taking the next steps in our relationship (long distance to short distance, from close to closer).

I just got done working the Kids Camp at the Rec Center and got great feedback on my performance and have a good chance of getting the assistant manager position if I decide to do camp next summer. Sounds pretty legit.

Maia Melton is going to be moving into my place, and so will a girl I don't know very well but who seems pretty awesome named Becky Alhadeff. The new dynamic with them plus Vanessa and I will be different but incredibly fun, I think!

I am going to be graduating (if all goes as planned) in the Spring with my BA with an emphasis in drawing. This summer I have decided that I will apply for the BFA as well making a total of 6 years here at Western and 2 degrees. I hope it all works out!

On the art front: I am currently trying to do lots of personnal art research now that camp is done and I have tons of free time. I am attempting to find direction for my visual work. I know that my work wants to deal with strong line and portraiture and using new mediums (especially finding ways to make drawings objects while still maintaining their integrity as drawings). Aside from that though I have discovered that I want to do performance art. The work of Marina Ambramovic and Ulay have been an exploding inspiration in my life, and I want to do three of their pieces with Evan this coming quarter. I plan on proposing them as part of my Art 494 class with Cara. The three pieces are Breath In Breath Out (above), AAA-AAA, and Light/Dark. This is the first time I've ever truly been inspired to do art outside the realm of the strictly visual. I hope Cara will appreciate my proposal of making this a part of my Art 494 program. And if she doesn't then I'll have to find other venues to perform these pieces. I believe that doing these mentally and physically demanding performances will strengthen mine and Evan's relationship and bring it to a place we've never been to before as well as give me a new foundation for the rest of my art to come and a new sense of ambition and drive.

Well, I think that has me mostly caught up. If I think of anything more I will add it. I will say that I want this blog to be more than just about me; I would love it to be a place where I can talk about art, movies, and music too on a regular basis.

Til next time!

i haven't posted in so long!

so, this is my first post here in months. i can't seem to be consistent on things like blogs or diaries. i will simply say that many things are different, or at least they seem that way. now that i have been reminded of this blog, hopefully i will post on it more regularly. now that i have deleted my facebook, maybe this will be my new internet outlet!

this new year

i've been home for break, a little less than a month i believe, and i don't think i really realized how unhappy i have been since i've gotten here until today. coming home certainly doesn't put me at ease. in fact it puts me even more on egde than all of finals week combined, i think. i can't be myself. i can't leave the house ever without a chaperone, i have to walk on eggshells to not trigger my mother into a rage, the simplest things become huge complications and scandals, and i can't see evan at my leisure even though he lives less than five minutes away. it makes me sick. and the thing that makes me sickest is that i'm too frightened of my mother to rock the boat, even though that's all i want to do. i want to just walk out the door without a word and tell her i'm in love with evan and there's nothing she can do about it, but i'm too fucking scared to. i don't want to make trouble for myself and my family; i'm a coward.

evan asked me today when i was going to break the ice with my mom? when i said i wasn't sure he told me that i was never going to and that there wasn't going to be a day when i wouldn't be under house arrest. he said he was going crazy with frustration and was tired of the whole situation. he called me back later to appoligize for the things he said, but i was saddened by how much truth was in those words. my brother told me that he was going to help me break it to mom, and that he wasn't going to go away and move to las vegas without getting her to accept my happiness one way or the other. this is encouraging but still leaves me wondering these fundamental questions: when the hell is the time going to be right? when am i going to set my mother straight on how i feel about evan? how will she respond to my decpetions all this time? time will tell.

i'm so ready to leave and not come back for a long long time. i can't wait to go home and fix up my room and the house, and then meet my new roommate leta. it's so exciting to think of being "on my own" again, and seeing all my friends i haven't seen in what feels like a long time.

don't get me wrong. despite my less than desirable familial feelings, i am very excited for this new year. i have a feeling that it's going to be fantastic. i have great friends and a wonderful boyfriend, a fabulous town to live in, a fun job doing what i love to do, the entire winter to strengthen up, lose weight, and train, and the beautiful spring and summer of climbing and outdoors to look forward to; not to mention i'm 21 years young! cheers to the new year, one and all, and here's to it being all you want it to be!!

christmas

my brother, evan, evan's cousin and i all went to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button this morning, and we were not disappointed.

it's a beautifully shot story of a man named banjamin button, played by brad pitt, who is born an old man and then proceeds to age backwards. the movie explains his life from birth to death (or birth again, i suppose), from his quirky "childhood" and "adolescence" to his travels around the world and his romance with a woman named daisy played by kate blanchette. filled with magic and humanity, it's a wonderful movie. definitely go watch it right away!

christmas goodies were had today, and i like to catalogue the things i recieve from family and friends. sometimes it helps me step away and realize how thankful i am for lovely people in my life.

the loot...

from my parents:

underwear!

cute leg warmers

sandalwood incense

"cross-action power" toothbrush

two lovely bracelets made from real stone (not sure what kind)

a "warming scarf" with microwavable inserts

two pairs of boots (both incredibly adorable)

from my brother:

an iPod nano

lost season 4

$60 gift card to Romy

from mary and audie:

a book light

wickless scented oils and a holder for them

$50

from evan:

a NERV mug (from anime neon genesis evangelion)

the movie Finding Neverland

from rachel:

a set of cute earrings

a large sketchbook

a plastic pallette

hurray for lovely gifts and loving people! merry christmas!